Misinformed

It might be interesting to note how quick people are to jump to conclusions and assume.

My bad, I did not state who I was refering to in my previous blog entries.

Jules is back in town.

We hadn't got a chance to really talk.

But I ain't really looking forward to it.

Maybe running away from the problems is so much easier than trying to resolve them.

WTF?

There is a difference in reminiscing lost love, and wallowing in self-pity...

My neighbor Brenda, told me a very touching love story last night.

It was so captivating that I kept poor Will waiting til after midnight for the planned supper.

I would like to begin it the old fashioned way..

Once upon a time, there was a boy and a girl whom knew from the age of 7 years old, that they were destined for each other.

They shared a bond that no one else could compare, having grown up together and having shared all the most important years of their childhood, teenhood and young adult years together.

The most amazing thing about their relationship, was that they were telepathic to each others' state of mind, emotions, sometimes even location.

They could sense a lot of things that were happening to each other at that point in time, it was a very strong emotional chord, unfathomable to others but only themselves.

(It sounds incredulous, but if you were to know Brenda personally, you would know that you can trust every word that comes out of her mouth.)

To cut a beautiful story short (lack of sleep, can't do justice to the story), they always thought that they were each other's destiny.

Through the childhood years, the teen years, the young adult years..

They were together, then they broke up.

They were together, then they broke up.

They were together, then they broke up.

It was always the circumstances at work, the numerous misunderstandings, the sheer number of obstacles which kept them apart, time and time again.

One would never believe how a relationship could have had as many obstacles as theirs.

They could sense their longings, the passion, the desire for each other, even when they were living in the different parts of the world.

They got increasingly worn down by the depression they could sense from each other, being kept apart.

"I want you, but I can't have you."

Eventually, they got married, to their own respective partners.

Life and love wore them out, they just wanna forget.

When they looked at their partners, they see only each other's regrets for the shattered destiny of a lifetime.

Their dreams were filled with each other's silouettes, shadows that were running away from each other, but mysteriously meet again.

It was the shattered destiny, which was shattering the rest of their lives in every aspect.

End.

I have never personally experienced love of this intensity but this is a really sad story which set me thinking...

It was why Brenda told me this story in the first place, she doesn't want me to experience the story for myself.

The lifetime of regrets, what-ifs and what could've-beens to bear.

They always broke up not knowing exactly why and what they did.

I wish he was in town, I really wanna ask him.

Why did you push me away then hold my hand again?

The Cutest Dog on Earth

Life is boring as a retail staff...

If I continue to stone like this, I'm turning into stone soon... Wait a minute, what's that crazy person doing, aiming the camera this way??!!

















Two can play at this game, somemore my camera better than yours. Professional one leh..

















Lemme learn how to use it first..

















Need to aim properly one mah..
















*Self-satisfied smile..* Haha gotcha!

















Wei's sidenote: Sometimes I think my brain either degenerate from the boredom or I go nuts. Forgive my silly post.

Something I stole from my friend...

Alone in this house again tonight

I got the TV on, the sound turned down and a bottle of wine

There's pictures of you and I on the walls around me

The way that it was and could have been surrounds me

I'll never get over you walkin' away

I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings show

And I thought that bein' strong meant never losin' your self-control

But I'm just drunk enough to let got of my pain

To hell with my pride, let it fall like rain

From my eyes

Tonight I wanna cry

Would it help if I turned a sad song on

"All By Myself" would sure hit me hard now that you're gone

Or maybe unfold some old yellow lost love letters

It's gonna hurt bad before it gets better

But I'll never get over you by hidin' this way

-"Tonight I Wanna Cry" by Keith Urban

For Mack

Hi, sorry I did not pick up your calls nor reply your sms.

Most of the time, I was at some noisy pub so I did not hear the calls at all.

I wanted to return your calls but I did not want to talk about him.

I had been thinking alot these days...

Couldn't help wondering why

Why he gave up without a fight

Then I mustered up my courage to sms him, "How's life?"

He said, "So.. So.. Abit lost and boring. Realised I do not have many close friends"

We chatted on the phone abit.

Talked about normal things, he said he would return the TVB drama VCDs he borrowed from my neighbor

I asked him how he found the drama

He said it was great story plot, but the ending was a little disappointing, abit weak.

I said, yeah.. funny how hard they fought in the palace for years and then suddenly for something trivial, they just gave up everything without a fight.

He agreed with me.

Then I said, just like you.

I initiated the break and you gave up without a fight.

He tensed and paused for a long time before saying, yah, I dunno why.

I said, you are tired too, that's why.

He said, yah, maybe.... I really needed a break, for the two of us.

I did not tell him I do not believe in taking breaks.

I always knew that you are either in or out.

We ended with take cares.

In all truth, perhaps I still harboured a teeny weeny little hope that he would fight a little more to have me back.

There was still a curious little dark thought that perhaps we would be back after a few weeks or so.

After last night's conversation, I knew that my decision to initiate a break was a right one.

We did end amiacably.

Because I think he wanted one but he is like you,

He would never have initiated one.

Like you, he never deserts nor abandon.

But I want no man to love me out of responsibilities and obligations.

The basis for love was so very wrong to start with.

Last night was further revealation which was both hurting and conclusive

I can finally put the matter to rest.

It was mutual and it was amicable.

I like it this way.

Because we share so much in common after all these years

That he would be the bestest best friend I would never have again.

When are you getting wasted with me, lesbian partner?

Life as a walking dead

You wake up in the morning and brush your teeth

You take your morning coffee and prepare to go to work

You travel to work and sit in front of the comp

Wondering how soon you can get off work

You wonder where you should go after work

Should you get wasted in the pubs again tonight

Or should you just seek solace in other people's companionship

Listening to their problems which you prob dun even give two hoots about

You get home wasted late at night

You take a shower and take off your contact lens

You lie in your bed

Too drunk to think

Too drunk to wallow

Too drunk to be miserable

You wake up in the morning with a hangover

And begin a new day all over again

Such is the life of a walking dead

I just needed to say this somewhere...

I found a big piece of my heart missing

It is in the shape of your silouette

It was when I said, no, to you yesterday

I did not understand back then

Why two people can't be together

When they are still deeply in love

Now I can

Seven years of shared dreams and aspirations

All shattered in a moment's deadly silence

We were so near to the finishing line

Yet a moment of truth revealed

We were actually so far

It broke my heart when I knew the real situation

The last two years had been a sham

I turned it into a scam

When all along I believed we were real

I do not dare look into your face

I know that I would just turn soft

I do not dare hear you cry

I know I would just hug you and never let go forever

Now there is a huge void where you used to fill

It is so big I can't find my heart anymore

Maybe when you have given it all

You have nothing more to give anymore